Well, the mail carried with it the first of my mentor’s comments for my Humber Correspondance program. Daunting would be the word I use to describe it; and even though I know it’s necessary to break down every last bit of the work in order to build it back up again, I can’t help but feel a bit defeated. Which then pushes me back into thinking about my interview with Wayne Johnston, who said that there’s no shame in discovering yourself a reader and not a writer.
And now I’ve got to spend the rest of the day revising my Classic Starts. Something that’s taken me far, far, far longer than it really should.
I’m doing the CW MA at UofT, and my mentor makes me cry every other time he reads my stuff. This is because I am too sensitive. I deal with this, however, by thinking of something a friend of mine said, which was that it’s not his job to tell me I’m great. There would be nothing productive about that. Your friends can be your cheerleaders, and your husband can be your biggest fan. But it’s the mentor’s job to kick your ass and make you turn your work inside out, and if he didn’t see your potential, he probably wouldn’t bother to make you work so hard. He’s picking on you because you can do it.
Don’t despair. I took a writing correspondence course once. You just have to develop a tough hide – and continue to believe in yourself.
Thank you both, and Kerry, I thought about applying to that program; I’d love to hear what you think of it.
I’m a bit brighter this morning. And am giving myself the weekend to think about her comments and start fresh on Monday with my re-writes. I can send in 45 pages over the six months of the program and intend to do just that.
If only to finish something in my lifetime of my own creation.
You’re very brave. I bet the program will turn out to be very rewarding and productive once you get past the initial dauntingness of it all.